Owl Vision 2018: Time Spent

by Renee Thornton –

I walk thru the winter white night, the moonlit silhouettes of the barren tree branches dance on the snow.  I am taken back to memories of playing in the snow with my boys, bundling them up for the endless hours of play spent sledding, making snowmen and snow angels alike.  Wet mittens and snow pants hung to dry and mugs of hot cocoa to thaw us out.  I miss them now that they are both grown and on their own and I often wonder, just how have I spent my time?    

As a child I looked forward; forward to summer vacation, getting bored, then forward to going back to school. I lived looking forward to being grown up, going to college, getting married and having children.  My life lay ahead of me.

As a young married woman I looked to the present; to my career, my children, my home responsibilities.  My focus was my current “To Do” list that was always prominently displayed in my kitchen for fear that out of sight meant out of mind.  I lived for PTA meetings, my kids sporting events, teacher conferences, school plays, summer vacations, endless hours studying as I furthered my college degree. The busy went on and on.  My life lay in the present.

When my children grew up and went on their own, I looked to the past; how did they grow up so quickly, where did the time go, what had I missed as I lived vicariously through them?  Lest I forgot when they were little, out came the pictures which I was in surprisingly very few, always behind the lens.  My life lay in the past.

Now that my husband and I can actually envision retirement a few years away, I again am looking forward: to travel, to new sights and scenes, to friends often left behind in the busyness of life, to projects done simply for the fun of it.  Again my life lies ahead of me.